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When
I feel the urge to shop, out of boredom or out of competition
with others, I try to think of things that I already have and
how I can take care of them. My house is an endless supply of
odd jobs and cleaning or organizing projects. Making a list
of these things, I can try to focus my energy towards these
things instead of the negative energy that I am feeling when
I am focusing on what I don't have.
Likewise,
organizing what you already have can shed light on your shopping
habits and how much you have already bought. My weakness is
craft supplies and each time I drive by a craft store, I feel
the urge to fill a cart full of stuff for myself. When I look
at the stuff I already have, I realize there is a lot that I
can already do with what I have, instead of buying more.
I
also find that when my house is tidy and organized, that I feel
more satisfaction in what I have. The sense of order, in a house
that is usually chaotic, can be a much more satisfying feeling
then buying and trying to find a place for another bag of stuff.
Creating
Traditions
Our
children may also have trouble with jealousy and that is why
we have tried to take the focus off of buying things for our
kids and instead focus on the traditions that we can create
for them as a family. Instead of loading them up with toys and
the latest gadgets, we come up with ideas that we can do with
our kids to show them how important family is. We create traditions
that do not cost a lot of money like having a pizza night, making
crafts together, having a special date night with one parent,
reading stories together, making special holiday traditions,
and just being together as a family. The things I remember from
my own childhood include the special traditions from my family
and I have few memories about what they bought me. These are
the kinds of things that I want my children to be focused upon
and less on all of the toys that could fill their room.
Gratitude
& Goals
One
of the things that have helped me with my jealousy is focusing
on my gratitude for what I already have and making goals for
myself for what I want out of life. I found a pretty journal
at our local dollar store and I started making a list of all
of the things that I love about my life already. When I feel
jealousy creeping back in, I start working on my list of all
that I am grateful for.
I
also have many goals for myself and for what I am doing with
my life, which take up a lot of my time. Instead of looking
at what everyone else is buying, I am trying really hard to
focus on building my business and creating goals for what I
can be doing in the future. I find the work that I do to be
rewarding and it helps me to stop thinking about possessions
and to think more about being a success in what I do.
However
you cope with jealousy, do not be afraid to ask him to leave.
It is your home and your heart- not his. You are the only one
who has the power to ask him to go and to fill that empty space
with positive substitutes. Do your best to refocus your energy
towards caring for what you own, creating traditions for your
family, and learning to live a life full of gratitude and positive
goals. Before you know it, you are going to be the envy of others
around you!
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